Conquer People Pleasing with this Game-Changing Method

If you frequently say yes when you want to say no, you're in good company. Nearly half of Americans identify as people pleasers. These folks struggle to assert themselves, set boundaries and ask for what they want or need. They'd rather keep the peace and go with the flow than face conflict, even if it means experiencing anxiety or guilt when they feel they've let someone down. However, a simple game can help tame some of these people-pleasing tendencies.

The DIME Game was developed by therapists to help people overcome their inclination to please others. It was developed from Dialectical Behavior Therapy, which teaches skills to manage a range of emotional and mental health challenges.

DIME stands for Describe, Inquire, Make a Request, and Express Yourself. It's comprised of 10 yes-or-no questions designed to navigate the fear of accepting or declining someone's request for help. The questions range from "Can I give the person what is wanted?" to "Is what the person is requesting of me appropriate to my relationship with this person?" and "Will saying no make me feel bad about myself?"

The DIME framework builds stronger communication skills, supports emotional regulation, improves conflict resolution, and fosters greater self-respect. It can be a game changer, especially for those who habitually prioritize others' needs over their own — a pattern that can often lead to resentment, burnout and strained relationships with family, friends and coworkers.

Complete guidelines can be found online. You can try it on your own or work with a therapist to begin to break free of these behaviors and the emotional baggage that accompanies them.